A lot of hard work, putting one foot in front of the other, learning to control myself and my powers, learning new habits and skills, and finally, learning how to deal with what I could do, and what I had done.
Its a lot, and I won't lie, but I think it is worth it.
Life is fucking scary, and actually making something of yourself? Putting yourself together when you have broken yourself or the world has? is hard and terrifying.
About the only two pieces of solace I can offer are these; one, it is worth it to do, because damn it feels better when you start having things work better. And two, you won't be alone.
I will be there to offer as much or as little advice and help as you want. And I am damn sure, though I cannot speak for her, but I am damn sure that Allison will be there too.
[Well, she hates that fear apparently means she has her shit together. But at least the idea that someone thinks she's thinking clearly is a comfort.
And that he respects Allison. Okay, actually - her fist instinct is jealously possessive, that's her sister, why is he making those very obvious judgments? But it passes, because guilt is good for nothing if not for reminding her that she deserves very little. So.]
I don't know how long I can think about it. my head hurts.
[She knows she's explaining herself poorly, but it's exhausted, walking through this. Just being propped up by someone else is absolutely Exhausting - listening to someone else to think well of her, she doesn't know what to do with that, and she's already in a place with so few options.]
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Its a lot, and I won't lie, but I think it is worth it.
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Life is fucking scary, and actually making something of yourself? Putting yourself together when you have broken yourself or the world has? is hard and terrifying.
About the only two pieces of solace I can offer are these; one, it is worth it to do, because damn it feels better when you start having things work better. And two, you won't be alone.
I will be there to offer as much or as little advice and help as you want. And I am damn sure, though I cannot speak for her, but I am damn sure that Allison will be there too.
[ He has a healthy respect for Allison. ]
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And that he respects Allison. Okay, actually - her fist instinct is jealously possessive, that's her sister, why is he making those very obvious judgments? But it passes, because guilt is good for nothing if not for reminding her that she deserves very little. So.]
shes here
shes been here
i dont want to be broken
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Good.
Broken is probably a bad word, and my bad for using it. Its what I used, but... it's not for everyone.
You have been hurt, by the world, and by life, and you have to find your path, your way, to rebuild, and to heal.
Wanting to heal, wanting to not be where you are now, is absolutely valid and makes sense.
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[She knows she's explaining herself poorly, but it's exhausted, walking through this. Just being propped up by someone else is absolutely Exhausting - listening to someone else to think well of her, she doesn't know what to do with that, and she's already in a place with so few options.]
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[ He has a habit of it, and now he feels bad. ]